This might come across as a closing to my blog, but believe me… we still got a ways to go with this pregnancy. I just wanted to take a minute to thank all those who have been aside me in this journey. I am LOVING the feedback and responses I have heard regarding each post. I have learned so much just from all the feedback on this blog and I totally recommend EVERY pregnant lady documenting this part of the journey! I know every mommy has different ways of being the best mommy ever but it is awesome to gain insight from all of them to decide what will be right for me and baby Salvatore!
Anyway, through each week of blogging I feel that I have been forced to reflect on everything about this life change. I attribute this particular refection to all the friends and family who have been teaching me expectations (both good and bad) of the next couple years as a mother. For as long as I can remember I have always defined success as having a career and being financially stable, leaving the thought of motherhood FAR from my mind! Being very career driven, my biggest goal in life was to have a high paying job that gave me a lot of authority. Ask any of my friends from high school where they thought they would see me at 26 years old. They would have probably suggested I would have been single, serious job, and for sure, childless. In fact, I was "anti-children". I was going to be the cool "aunt" that just spoiled all my friends' kids. Funny how your plans for life are so very different than life’s plans for you!
I was 18 when I met Tyler and granted I was not looking to settle down or anything, but through all our dating we never held each other back from traveling, school, or career choices, and he was just one of those guys you don’t let slip through your fingers no matter what…but unfortunately through the last eight years together I had no career to show for any personal success and a husband that was dying for a baby of his own. (I have always said career before babies – no question about it) I have a job that I am pretty damn good at, but it is not what I see doing for the rest of my life. So, I really had to look at things and revaluate what is more important in life for us as a couple- my mediocre job or my husband's desire to grow a family? As disappointing as it is and as much as I struggle with being pregnant and no personal career achievements in place, I have been able to see a new perspective to this. The grass is always greener on the other side. I am 26 years old and I have a marriage that I feel is unheard of for a girl my age. I have a husband that has a great head on his shoulders, fabulous career in his pocket, and is extremely excited to take on fatherhood. (I know this is a reoccurring phrase - but I could not ask for more in that department.) I feel spoiled when it comes to all my relationships in life… that being said, first and foremost I mean my marriage, but I am also including all of my amazing family (Tyler's and mine combined) and all my amazing friends. I have so many people I can count on and call for anything. Maybe if I would have had a career I would have lost some of that along the way. If it is true that you “can’t have it all” then forget the dumb career... I have redefined “success” for my life. Yes, I still want that career, but it is not what I will classify as the peak of success for my life. From here on out - my new goal for success is to be the best wife a man could ask for, a thoughtful and dependent friend and family member… and soon to be a loving and nurturing mother! I don’t know it yet, but from the sounds of it – it’s a very challenging and rewarding career to become a mother so I hope I can step up to the plate and hit a home run here!!
Exercising? We have been walking everyday! Baya is requiring less and less treats for the walk – so that is awesome! We still can not get her to walk with just one of us though. It seems to be a two person job. Other than walking, I have not been keeping up with any other workouts… unfortunately I was feeling the fatigue this week. Might try some weight lifting this week if I can manage to get the strength!
Maternity clothes? Nope, and thinking I will attempt to hold off now – I feel like with a little less than 2 months, I would rather not spend the money... plus the heat limits me to T-shirts and sport shorts when I am not working...
Sleeping? Can't get enough sleep, actually!! I was JUST telling Tyler that I was feeling good and that this 3rd trimester fatigue is nothing like the 1st trimester – THE VERY NEXT DAY, 2pm hit and I was dying for a nap! I had to go and put my foot in my mouth! I am begging for sleep any time I can get it now. In fact… I was the happiest kid on the block when I got into bed BEFORE 8:30pm Thursday night. I don’t understand why I WANT to sleep so much because sleeping doesn’t even go all that well when I zonk. I am up every time I move because it takes a lot of concentrating on moving with this belly… and then when I am awake, I might as well just get up and use the bathroom because if I don’t I will probably be up soon to do that anyway. So yes, sleeping has now become a big priority in my life right now.
Missing Anything? I need a drink. With lots of vodka in it. And a blue cheese stuffed green olive. Or, know what else I was thinking about this week!?!? Old Fashions – with GARLIC stuffed green olives… oh man… I need a stiff cocktail pronto!!
Food cravings? YOU WON'T BELIEVE THIS! I THINK I HAD MY FIRST CRAVING! Saturday night Tyler and I were watching TV and even though it was like 10 o’clock at night – I was dying for some BW3s… to be more specific, I was dying for some medium wings and buffalo chips. (A nice cold miller Miller Lite would have gone great with that, too.) I was really wondering if we could go GET some “right now” at 10pm on a Saturday night… I mean if he would have said he was open to it and we should go I would have been the first buckled into the car! The craving has gone and past, but it was so weird how much I wanted those wings and fries at that very moment!
Heartburn? Not really… I am noticing a LITTLE acid reflux... very little though and nothing to complain about.
Anything making you queasy or sick? Nada… feeling good!
This Weeks Symptoms? Fatigue is the number one thing I am dealing with right now. Also, thank God we are continuing to walk once or twice a day, because also if I sit or stand too long all day my back starts to dislike me. It is a very low pain, like almost by my tail bone. It is nothing like my rib pain, just annoying and it feels like I need to stretch or walk it off. Rib pain has been very annoying, as usual. Good thing there is Tylenol – just wish it helped MORE.
Any Movement? Non-stop! I mean I know he naps in there pretty frequently, but I also have no doubt that I know when he is awake! I can't believe how strong the movements get as each week gets closer to his delivery! Sometimes they are just a little uncomfortable and honestly, sometimes they make me look forward to NOT sharing my space with a little rambunctious baby. But as every pregnant lady says, it is awesome to have the experience and feel him in there!
Labor Signs? Nope. Unless... do those braxton hix contractions count? I don't even know if they are braxton hix but I assuming from what I hear. It is a SUPER mild and painless tightening around my belly and it gets kinda hard... it feels weird to move when it happens, too. It is really weird feeling! I have had maybe 10 in the last week.
Belly Button: in or out? Still out but I think it is getting a little more stretched out with the growing belly!!
Wedding rings on or off? Still able to wear them during the day with no problems! Just always looking forward to taking them off after work because they start to get a little tight....
Overall Mood this week? Tired, tired, tired, and a little anxious which does not mix well when you are tired! I just want to get the house in order all of a sudden! I don't really have all the energy in the world, but I want to clean, put everything in it's spot, and make the place look immaculate.... is this called nesting?!? It was a struggle this week battling the fatigue and the yearning to clean and organize! It made me crabby that I felt I could not get things done that I wanted to get done! Instead of painting for a couple hours when I got home from work I was a blubbery sap on the couch because I was too tired to move. I have been down Tyler's throat about cleaning and organizing this and that... I feel bad for the guy, but I just need things to HAPPEN because once the babe is here- I think the world stops and no one cleans or organizes anything in their house for a long time... maybe like years... haha, I know I am exaggerating but really - who has time to organize a closet when they have a baby that needs to be fed every 2 hours!?!? So yes - my calm and collective mood has been snow balling into a little more crazy, clean, organize and get things done RIGHT NOW mood. Also, I am just worried that this fatigue and lack of mobility will get more annoying and I would like to get things done before I physically cannot do them. So I will add FEAR to my mood, because I honestly am fearing that I will not be able to get the things done I want to get done because, as if you didn't know yet, I am pregnant and I am learning that this slows you down whether you want it to or not!
Looking forward to? It will be a great week ahead! We have our first Kinderpuppy class on Monday and then our first Baby Shower on Sunday! I cannot believe that we are having a baby shower already!! I remember my BRIDAL showers like yesterday, and now we are having a BABY shower. SO surreal. So amazing that family and friends come together to make this special time even MORE special. Cannot wait!
Pit of the week? Having no energy to get much done after work. Feeling like my days are going to be getting shorter... the night owl has left the building and not by choice! The couch calls my name at 5pm!
Peak of the week? FINISHING THE MURAL PAINTING IN THE NURSERY!! Might be one of the biggest peaks of the last 32 weeks, actually! Haha. Wow, it was a very strenuous task and I am not sure if I knew how hard it was actually going to be if I would have done it, but it is DONE and it is beautiful! Being pregnant makes everything a little harder, too, I think... Anyway, I am MORE THAN HAPPY with it and Sal is not allowed to paint his room till he is 21 years old! Haha! Or if we continue to use this room as the nursery for following babies and if there is a little girl in our future, she will have to do with the blue walls... we are not changing that nursery up for anything!
Make it a great week everyone!
Much Love,
Jax
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